Written for the blog in April 2021.
As a 37-year-old woman, I’m in the thick of training my mind. For most of my life, my thoughts ruled my mind. True or not, I allowed them to take up space and become my beliefs. Now, as an adult, I’m learning how to actually control my mind, and it’s not always an easy process!
Of course, as a teacher who desires for those around me to live well and experience freedom, I try to do this with my kids as well. Imagine what it would be like if we could teach our children how to take their thoughts captive before they become adults. Think about how much more emotionally healthy they would be and how it could impact their entire lives. I’m fascinated by neuroplasticity, and as a momma who wants the best for my kids, I can’t help but have these conversations with them.
Recently, my daughter has been struggling with perfectionism and believing negative thoughts when she makes a mistake. I was frustrated because when she gets to that place (where the limbic brain has taken over!), it’s almost impossible to speak the truth to her. She won’t hear it. So, I started preparing in advance. Before a sporting event, I started saying this:
“I want you to know that you’ll make a mistake today. Everyone will. You cannot play a perfect game – it’s impossible! So I want you to start thinking about what your reaction is going to be after you make a mistake.”
“What’s the first thought that typically goes through your head when you make a mistake?”
“Is that a lie or truth?” (of course it’s a lie)
“And if that’s a lie, then what is going to be the truth that you are going to repeat over yourself at that moment?”
When the limbic brain takes over, it’s really hard to think rationally, but we can PREPARE for this situation and not allow ourselves to spiral by being ready. We can get on guard and ready to fight—ready to take EVERY thought captive and make it obedient to Christ.
It won’t be overnight, but we’re going to keep working on it. Ultimately, I hope and pray that her truth is that she is a daughter and her performance in ANY part of her life does not affect her identity. She is a daughter of the King, and that position cannot be taken away by a mistake.
I’m going to repeat that over you: YOU are a Daughter of the KING, and YOUR royal position CANNOT be taken away by a mistake.
Know it. Speak it. Believe it. LIVE it.
How have you been speaking truth over your kids lately?
